Me too!
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
