Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
