My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
my liver is dry heaving
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
