would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
did you just send me my own nude
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Randomize
