A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Princesses don't give blow jobs
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
