We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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