sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
