i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
