if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
