We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i came on her dog
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
