So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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