This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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