she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
