There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
