Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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