lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
