Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
