What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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