haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
