apparently the secret to your success is patron
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
