I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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