going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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