Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
P.S. I can't hear my feet
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
