Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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