I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
