I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
even my farts smell like vagina
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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