yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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