9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
