Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
time to smoke my breakfast
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
