oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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