How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I think my moral compass just broke
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
