I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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