So drunk its hurt
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
