He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
