Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
