Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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