do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
my phone needs a breathalizer
can u get pink eye on your cock?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
