the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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