When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
