Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
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