there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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