I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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