Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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