on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize