I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
