Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
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