i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
