woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
