how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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