I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
