I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
